Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
