i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Small penises have feelings too.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
