do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
