from now on my penis is your penis
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
