a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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