is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
