I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
