google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
