Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
