no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
