just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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