Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
