So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
