chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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