I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
