Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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