We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I just saw a hot homeless man
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
