I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
