Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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