Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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