A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
