I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize