Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
