just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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