who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
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