I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize