when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
