There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
