I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
