Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize