Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize