Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
