The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
