I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
