I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Is it because I queefed?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize
