This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I think people are normalizing furries
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
