I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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