honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
