just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
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