how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
