Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
