Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize