the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
