I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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