waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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