I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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