Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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