You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
