the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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