Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
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