i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
